can't wait to see this film

Medicine for Melancholy.
Coming to San Francisco, 3/6.

totally awesome

This President's Day weekend, I hung out with some friends from my ol' Boston days: Jenny, Arny, Kenny, Judy, and Melissa. We spent the day dodging the rain and hiking in Big Sur. After a long day, we headed back to Kenny's spacious townhouse and cooked dinner and vegged out on the floor after dinner.

Me: Man, I feel so dead right now. I want to take a shower but can't get up. I'm just going to fall asleep here.

Arny: Well, before you do, there's something I want to show you guys.

(The girls look at each other nervously.)

Me: Whaaaat--?

Arny: Kenny and I have something for you guys. Just wait right here while Kenny and I take care of stuff upstairs.

(Arny goes up the stairs).

Judy: Oh my gosh...

Jenny: Are they going to sing?

Me: Or do a dance?

(Melissa mutters warily.)

(I start doing that weird hyper giggling/squealing that you do when you're about to enter a haunted house, but you're excited, too.)

Finally, Arny peeped his head out and said they were ready....

The girls: OH my gosh...

Here is what happened when we got to Kenny's room.



It's Valentines Day
and who really gives a crap (gives a crap)
'bout a fake holiday
that just makes you feel like... crap

We know that thirty's round the bend (ooooh-ooooh)
Our twenties are almost at an end (ooooh-ooooh)
But you still got time to find the man you're looking for (awwwww!)

You don't need a heart-shaped box
Or a card that says "Hallmark" on the back
to know that each of you really rocks (really ro-o-o-o-o-o-o-ocks)
Well, V-day is just really whack

But yooooooou are totally awesome (TOTALLY AWESOME!!)
There are dudes who are just that into--
Yooooooou are totally awesome (SO FRICKIN' AWESOME!!)

Happy Vaaaaalentines Day!

(You're really hot!)

(c) Arnold Kim, 2009

Yeah, I still get emotional when I watch this. It was such a wonderful gift from these two great friends of mine, and I can't help but share this song with everyone. Valentine's Day up until that day was an afterthought -- I, like most of our group, actually liked not having the pressure of celebrating v-day with a significant other and having to get gifts and such. And I have been "out" of a relationship long enough to not miss it. Ironically, Arny and Kenny took it upon themselves to plan a v-day gift for us girls. Not only did they write and sing a song for us, but Kenny baked heart-shaped gingerbread cookies while Arny bought some fancy chocolate truffles from Berkeley's Gourmet Ghetto. Here we are with our gift bags.



Anyways, in the spirit of this song, just wanted to tell you all that you are totally awesome, every day -- and who needs a friggin' holiday to validate you only once a year? Thank you, Arny and Kenny for the reminder.

sad deaths in berkeley

Yay! It's Sunday morning, and I am free as a bird and am craving some good yoga to close off my stressful last few weeks and to start off my week with. I go online to check the Sunday schedule at my favorite yoga studio, hyp, only to find that it closed down around the holidays in December, due to the economic downturn. Aw man.

So, I look up the schedule for another yoga studio in Berkeley and find one that I've passed by before, that has a class at the time I was hoping for. I drive over there, and it's a large room that's packed with people. Uh, no thanks - don't feel like paying $16 to get stressed out as I'm trying to position myself in various poses, crammed against other people, and neglected by the instructor.

So, I walk out and notice Elephant Pharmacy across the street. "Oh, this is the place where my friend has suggested we go to buy natural and environmentally-friendly make-up!" We never had a chance to go together and I never made the trip to go out before on my own, but since it was right there, I decided to walk on over. I get to the door. It looks closed, but the hours say 9am-8pm... And then I see the flyers.

"Elephant Pharmacy filed for Chapter 7 bankruptcy on February 3, 2009." That was just five days ago!

"It has been a special 6 years..."

Oh, this is just too sad.

spend five minutes with me

What is this video about? It's about a lot of things, many of which I can't figure out, and am using this video as a tool to learn something about myself...and to just have fun with video. How I've missed doing this stuff!

The first bud of inspiration came from my bible study ("freeform") group on Psalms when the facilitator asked us "What do you do or how do you think God speaks to you?" A young woman in my group responded, "I know it sounds weird, but I look in the mirror." She then went on to explain that she could feel beautiful one moment, and disgusting in another, but somehow looking at the mirror grounded her and reminded her of God's view of her.

I liked her response. And it led me to want to observe myself. I hadn't been feeling too good about myself, and a thought occurred to me - what would I look like if I looked at myself from an external lens and not the internal, self-critical lens? Perhaps viewing myself through video could enable me to view myself the way others do...the mirror was still too subjective for me, but a video of myself seemed more detached and objective.

So for a week, I chronicled myself for at least five minutes every day (it usually turned out being more because I would forget about it) - without any agenda or script, but just being my mundane self. It was a bit enlightening, a little amusing, mostly boring, but oddly soothing. I won't share the details of what I've learned - that's for me only. But, I may share more clips later.

Also, I really missed being here in the last part of January. I was working some late nights and weekends in the office, and I felt a little lonely and disconnected from people. I really wanted to post this video earlier and feel connected in some way for a couple of minutes...but haven't had a chance to until now.

For those of you who need some comic relief from my oh-so-serious-"I'm being an artist" moment -- and i'm thoroughly enjoying it -- check this out.

*Oh, and I'm looking at condos in this clip.